Top phone behaviors that kill a marriage, according to a couples therapist

A couples therapist is offering suggestions on how your partner’s phone activity may signal that you may need to put the relationship on hold.

Jonathan Van Viegen is an online family therapist and social media influencer who claims he can help people transform their relationship from “conflict to relationship” if they use his advice and programs.

In a recent viral Instagram spin, the married father of two revealed the top nine phone behaviors that have the potential to kill a marriage.

The main red flag is not sharing passwords with a partner, according to Van Viegen.

Other “depressing” behaviors he warned include when partners “hide their phone” and “keep [their] phone face down.â€

Other habits on the list include when a partner turns their body or phone away from you while on it, if your spouse closes apps or locks the device when you approach them, if they’ve recently changed their password, if it’s hot and cold for you to touch the phone theirs, whether they get angry or defensive when asked why privacy is important, and whether they are always protective of their device.

The relationship therapist, with over 162,000 followers on Instagram, claimed his wife agreed the nine behaviors were harmful and they would “never” allow such actions to happen in their marriage.

“Saying that you should follow our example – so you do. But rest easy knowing that at least one other couple in the world isn’t putting up with these depressing red flags,” Van Viegen wrote.

His post received mixed reviews in the comments section.

“These are healthy behaviors in relationships. People who think it’s controlling probably don’t have healthy boundaries/relationships, one person wrote.

Others say that some of the things he listed invade their partner’s privacy and are not necessary.

“Why don’t we normalize secure attachment styles instead that focus on trust and allow privacy without secrecy,” suggested one user.

“I have a phone addiction and putting it face down drastically reduces how often I pick up my phone. Modifying its behavior,” another person pushed back in the comments section.

Van Viegen’s site is full of helping couples rebuild their relationships, so if phone issues have caused a lot of mistrust in a partnership, in a separate video, he encouraged users to “deal with issues of trust with optimism and practicality”.